15 posts tagged “my kid is funny”
I am 19 weeks pregnant now. That means I am halfway there. Those of you wondering if I failed math in school, rest assured, I am right. See, 19 times 2 is 38. And that's as far as this baby is going to go. I don't want another preemie, I don't want another induction, but I think 38 weeks is a nice respectable amount of time. I don't consider it early. So 38, here we go.
"Did you have a nice nap?" (This was yesterday when she napped. She did not nap today).
"yes"
"Did you dream?"
"yes"
"What did you dream about?"
"poopie"
"You dreamt about poopie??"
"poopie"
I don't think she did dream about poopie, but was instead telling me that she had a poopie in her diaper. A rather smelly one at that.
SkyWalker: How come I don't have a womb?
SkyWalker said perhaps the funniest thing I have ever heard him say while having a tantrum:
SkyWalker insisted that the Princess sit next to him during lunch today (instead of across from him) because "I love her". He claimed that he would take care of her, i.e., make sure she didn't drop anything. Then he said "If it's clean, I can touch it. If it's not clean YOU can touch it." I'm assuming he meant her cup or whatever else she might throw. Then he asked me to cut his peanut butter and jelly sandwich into triangles because he wasn't doing very well. He told me to "do the best you can." Thanks dude.
There are so many funny things to share I can't possibly remember them all. Today while playing Disney Memory, SkyWalker turned over Alice in Wonderland and said "Alice in Wonderland. Like Alice in Chains." I love this boy.
He and his sister were wrestling in his room (yes, they were wrestling. Crawling all over each other, giggling like crazy). He dragged her around the room by her leg and she loved it. I checked on them again and she was naked and he was chasing her trying to kiss her heiney. He was successful.
Quite possibly the funniest thing today was this morning as he was getting dressed. When we were at his check up on Monday his pediatrician had a hard time finding his testicles. It was cold. He was nervous. They were riding a little high. This morning he was naked and I looked and all I see is empty sac. So I say "Where are your balls?" He looks down and says "Where ARE my balls?" and starts feeling around. He's pulling and pulling on himself and gets one down. He says "Here's one." I say "Okay." He says "Maybe I just have one ball?" I said "No [giggle] you have two". He says "Where ARE my balls?" again and attacks himself looking. It was the funniest thing ever. But now I'm going to have to have Daddy check him out and make sure he's got 2 where they're supposed to be!
Joy!
Yes, I know. I usually talk about poop. But sometimes pee is blog worthy too.
Twice this week I have put the Princess on the potty and she has peed. SkyWalker and I clap and dance and sing and she claps and it is funny.
Twice in the last week SkyWalker has NOT peed his bed. Yay for progress, however slow it is.
I stepped out of the shower and SkyWalker ran behind me, slapped my butt, sang a "hairy heiney" song and then asked where my balls were. I said I don't have them. He said rather dismissively, "Well, what DO you have?" and I told him what I have and what the mens have. He then chased me as I tried to get my underwear on and sang "Where are you heiney?"
This, however, is the kicker. It happened at least a week ago but it was too traumatic for me to blog or even tell anyone about it.
Brace yourselves.
I was sitting on the potty, peeing, when SkyWalker came in and announced he wanted to pee on my pee. Sure, fine, whatever. Before I had a chance to get up, he aimed his little wee-wee for the gap between my rear and the toilet and peed. He did have very good aim.
He peed on me.
An almost 4-year old peeing on you is much different than a newborn.
I don't think I'll ever be the same.
I have a playdate in one hour. The Princess has done nothing but cry all morning. She's pooping like crazy. She's snotty, but I'm really not sure if that's from all the crying or not. We were at a playdate on Tuesday and there was a little boy there with endless snot, so it's very possible she picked something up. SkyWalker was just laying on the couch saying his tummy hurt. Of course now he says he's fine because he's asking for a snacky-snack.
I have a million things on my to-do list today. I have already swept up Isaac's dead skin, so now I still need to do laundry. And then more laundry. And clean the pee off of the guest bathroom floor. And straighten up the kitchen. And pack. And drain the pool.